


Solitude

by ladykardasi



Series: Solitaire [2]
Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: First Time, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-14
Updated: 2017-05-14
Packaged: 2018-10-31 18:43:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10905201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladykardasi/pseuds/ladykardasi
Summary: Companion piece to Solitaire, from Garak's point of view.





	Solitude

Bronze Golden O for Best DS9 slash 1999

Garak stared at the wall and sighed deeply. How thickheaded could that Human be anyway? He tried it all, Cardassian style flirting, Human style flirting, Bajoran style flirting… nothing helped, nothing worked. He sighed again. Maybe Julian had understood and simply wasn't interested and he was just making a fool out of himself every time he tried to get through to him? 

Perhaps he should just give up and finally accept the fact that Julian Bashir was not interested. Perhaps the easiest thing would be to simply look for love elsewhere. Find some willing male who wasn't too particular whom he went to bed with. But the sad truth was that nobody on the entire station attracted him the way Julian did. And certainly nobody else knew him well enough to be attracted to him… and the simple fact was that it didn't matter. All he wanted was Julian. 

He sipped his kanaar and let it swirl around his tongue. The bittersweet taste of the aged liquor filled his mouth and he leaned his head back and savored the taste and texture of it. 

Was it maybe too late? Ever since he found out about Julian's enhancement he felt more agitated around the young man. Oh, he knew why. Ever since that fact came out, the possibilities felt endless. Julian's enhancements meant that he wasn't so weak as he seemed. Garak had always looked upon Julian as a rather fragile being, unable to really be a worthy partner of him. Not mentally - no - Julian had a keen mind. Perhaps a bit naive and gullible, but that was what was so charming about him. But to be quite truthful he worried about Julian's strength. Could the young man really withstand a Cardassian's passion? 

Garak smiled bitterly. Julian was such a mixture of interesting contradictions. He had a very beautiful appearance, which was the first thing that had attracted him to the young man, but the Cardassian had soon realized that there was more to Julian than simple looks. He had a sparkling wit that Garak had not anticipated that day when he made his first pass at Julian. But the naiveté had caused Julian not to understand his blatant flirting and strong come-on. Since then Julian had gotten older and simply more desirable for each year that passed. 

Garak closed his eyes and let his imagination run free. How many times had he dreamed about reaching out to touch that perfect, silky soft skin? How many times had he left their lunches hard and aching for Julian's touch, while the young man seemed totally oblivious to the sparks that flew between them whenever they were together? Garak felt himself stiffen once more as he thought about Julian, Julian's lips, his long, slender fingers - those surgeon's hands kneading expertly at his neck-ridges…

Garak moaned silently and the trousers he was wearing suddenly felt all too small. He felt a bit resigned at the fact that a mere thought of the young Human could put him in this state, but he was tired of sitting there all alone, satisfying his needs in solitude. 

He closed his eyes as he put the glass of kanaar on the table next to the sofa, then swiftly unclasped his trousers and slid his hand down between his legs to start stroking himself in that age-old rhythm. 

"Oh yes," he moaned. He was imagining Julian's slender hands touching him and the arousal grew steadily. He leaned his head back and thought about how it would feel if Julian's soft lips were closing around him... 

That's when the doorbell rang. Guiltily, Garak stopped what he was doing and buttoned his trousers. He winced at the feeling of his hardness being restrained into the unforgiving pants. 

"Who is it?" he said. Even to his own ears his voice sounded harsh and unsteady. 

"It's me, Julian, can I come in?" 

Garak hardened even more at the sound of the young man's voice, but he couldn't think of one single reason not to let Julian in, short of telling him the truth. 

Of course, Garak thought to himself. I can just see it now. I'll just blurt out. Oh Julian, I'd prefer it if you'd come back later. Right now I was in the middle of satisfying myself. I was imagining how you were giving me a very thorough blowjob, and if you come in here right now I don't know what I'll do…

"Enter," he said against his better judgment. He checked his clothing one last time as the young man entered. 

"Hello, Garak." 

"Doctor, what can I do for you?" he said as calmly as he could but he turned from Julian to sit in the armchair. He fidgeted a little and crossed his legs to hide the state he was in. Okay, he thought, just think of something else. "Come in and sit down," he said and gestured politely at the sofa. 

Julian stepped in and sat on the couch. "I just felt like some company, Garak, that's all. I hope I didn't disturb you."

"No, never, Doctor," Garak lied. 

"Are you all right, Garak? You seem a little tense… " 

Oh yes, I am tense all right, Garak thought to himself and swallowed carefully. "I am fine, Julian. I am just a little… Never mind, Doctor. It will pass."

That was the completely wrong thing to say to Julian. He knew it as soon as the words left his mouth. The young man rose from the sofa and came closer. His eyes were shining with concern. The doctor in Julian awakens, Garak thought bitterly. 

"Doctor, there is nothing wrong with me, I assure you," Garak protested when Julian leaned forward to check his temperature in the normal human manner. He pressed his hand against Garak's forehead. Normally that wouldn't be so bad, but now, when he was already achingly hard with need, it felt like Julian's hand was made of pure fire. He gasped involuntarily and closed his eyes. 

"Julian, would you please not do that…" he begged. 

"What? I am just checking your temperature. You seem a little flushed."

"Well, uhm. It is a little warm in here. I felt cold when I got back from the shop and turned up the heat a little too much I am afraid," he improvised while he none too gently took Julian's hand away from his face. If the young man did not stop touching him there, he would do something he would regret. 

"Garak, there is obviously something wrong. Why don't you tell me what is going on?" 

Garak fidgeted once more. Julian was scrutinizing him rather intensely. It was only a question of time before the young man would see the state he was in unless he could divert his attentions to something else. Regretfully he could not get up and offer Julian a drink, since that would expose him immediately. Go away, he addressed his uncooperative companion but the erection refused to subside. Quite the contrary - it seemed to grow even more and he felt like he couldn't sit still any more. Julian - get out of here before I do something that will really, truly shock you. 

"Oh," Julian gasped as his eyes fell to Garak's crotch. 

It was too late. Garak closed his eyes for a second, and then he opened them again. Julian's face turned a lovely crimson color and Garak watched in fascination as his friend's face changed from shock to - something else. Could that be a glint of desire, deep down in those hazel eyes, Garak wondered. 

"Oh, indeed," Garak said dryly. "You just couldn't leave it alone, could you?"

"I'm… I'm sorry Garak. I was just worried. You never tell me if there's anything wrong with you so I have to be rather… persistent. I didn't mean to… "

"I know you didn't," Garak growled. That's part of the problem, he thought. If you wanted to arouse me I'd be the happiest Cardassian alive. Garak rose from the chair. He no longer had any reason to sit there and try to hide it. So he walked over to the replicator.

"Would you like something to drink, Doctor?" he queried politely.

"That's it?" Julian said. His voice was full of amazement. "I realize that you have an… an… "

"… an erection?" Garak filled in for him. 

"Yes, and that's it…?"

"What more do you want me to say?" Garak queried and turned around. He had not expected Julian to pursue the topic. Now he was positively intrigued. "Do you want me to say 'Please go doctor so I can do something about this' or perhaps you want to talk about it in depth? I thought the best course of action would be to just drop the subject. I assume this is something that has happened to you as well on occasion. At an inconvenient time, of course… "

"Of course. Uhm…" Julian silenced. "Garak, I am sorry. I shouldn't have brought it up at all." 

Julian licked his lips nervously and Garak nearly hissed at the innocent, but arousing gesture. 

Then Julian looked up and into his eyes. "Can I just ask you one thing, Garak? I'd like for you to be completely honest for once."

"I will not promise anything, Doctor, but if it is within my power to do so I will answer honestly."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

Julian fidgeted a little and then he continued. "This is a terribly personal question, but why were you aroused?"

"Well, I was thinking about someone - special."

"Of course," Julian murmured. "Garak?"

"Yes?"

"Are you still aroused?"

"Yes," Garak admitted coarsely.

"Does this have to do with this - special someone?"

"Yes." Garak moved restlessly back to the armchair and sat down.

"This special someone, could that possibly be - me?"

"Yes." Garak admitted breathlessly before he could stop himself and watched as Julian rose from the sofa and came over to him. He turned toward the young man, gasping when he saw that he too, was excited. 

"Garak?"

"Yes?"

"Do you want me?"

"Yes!" Garak admitted and moaned as the young man simply straddled his lap and flung his arms around him. Guls, Garak thought. This can't be happening. Was it this easy? I should have just told him, is that it? 

"Why didn't you ever say something?" Julian asked.

"What was I supposed to say? It isn't really in me to walk up to someone and casually say. 'Oh, by the way, dear Doctor. Would you mind terribly sharing my bed?'" 

Julian laughed softly and leaned closer. His mouth stopped only a fraction of an inch from Garak's lips. "You could have voiced it a little differently, you know," he teased.

"How?" Garak asked and felt his mind dissolve into a frenzy of lust. 

Julian was definitely aroused by now, and his hardness pressed against Garak's stomach. "Oh, I don't really know, but I am sure you could have thought of something. That mouth of yours is so talented…"

Julian leaned in to close that fraction of an inch and pressed his lips against Garak's. The warmth of Julian's mouth and tongue wreaked havoc with Garak's senses and he moaned helplessly. The young man's hands moved curiously from his shoulders over his neck-ridges and Garak gasped. 

"You like that, Elim?" he whispered. 

His given name from those lips…. 

"Ah, yes," Garak gasped between clenched teeth "Yesss... Right there."

Garak didn't say much for a few minutes. His breathing became ragged as he reveled in the sensations Julian's hands were giving him. He kissed Julian enthusiastically and let his hands move over the younger man's lithe form. He couldn't believe Julian was there, sitting in his lap, pressing willingly against him obviously every bit as aroused as he was. 

"Julian," Garak hissed. 

"Yes?"

"You are driving me crazy. I need to…" 

"What?" Julian asked huskily. "Tell me, Elim. What do you want?"

"Julian! Don't make me ask for it," Garak growled. 

Julian slithered out of Garak's lap, and with surprising strength he pulled the Cardassian to the edge of the chair to get easier access. "Oh yes, it appears that you have a bit of a problem, don't you? Shall I remedy it?" Julian teased and pressed his hand firmly against the bulge on Garak's pants. 

"I would very much appreciate that," Garak admitted weakly as he felt Julian's slender but strong fingers squeeze him expertly. It wouldn't take much… 

"Are you close?" Julian queried softly. 

Garak simply nodded. "You kind of - uhm - interrupted me…" He felt a little silly to admit such a thing to Julian, but on the other hand it was rather obvious anyway. 

"Then let's take care of you first," Julian murmured and got down on his knees. With nimble fingers he undid the clasp of the Cardassian's pants and pulled them down in a swift movement. 

"Beautiful!" Julian's voice purred in a lusty whisper and Garak clenched his teeth. The words sent shivers through his body. Never before in his life had he been so excited - if he had - he couldn't remember it… 

In a flash he realized that he was about to experience first hand what he had been dreaming of only a short while ago, and he forced his eyes open to watch as Julian's beautiful face came closer to take him inside that hot, wet mouth. He couldn't keep his eyes open for long though and his eyelids fluttered shut as he surrendered to the pleasure Julian was causing.

"Julian…" he groaned. His hands rested on the younger man's shoulders and they dug into his flesh involuntarily. "Gods… Julian, that feels so… so good…"

Julian's mouth traveled down his entire length, suckling and licking, pulling away for a few seconds, only to engulf the Cardassian again. Up and down, in a steady rhythm that swiftly pushed Garak closer to release. When Julian's teeth lightly grazed against the ridge at the base, Garak moaned helplessly. He was trembling from head to toe as he poured his seed into the younger man's mouth in almost violent convulsions. Julian licked him clean with an impish smile on his lips. Garak sighed as he felt the younger man's lips kiss him tenderly on his stomach. 

"You don't know how long I have wanted to do this… you taste so good, Elim," Julian whispered. 

Garak looked at Julian, trying to catch his breath. He stood and reached out, pulling the doctor to him, murmuring, "Come here. I have a few fantasies of my own..."

Julian smiled at him and Garak still couldn't believe what was happening when Julian pulled his head closer. The nimble human fingers dug into his hair, and Garak felt shivers run down his spine. What would that smooth, golden skin taste like? He couldn't wait to find out. As they kissed, Garak could already feel his arousal growing again. 

He hadn't been so close to another being for so long, let alone someone he felt so incredibly attracted to. He slid his arms around Julian's slender shape and held him close while he enjoyed the young man's mouth. He could have stood there, kissing him, forever. He tasted so good. Garak felt like he couldn't have enough and he hissed when Julian's hard erection pressed against him. 

"Garak," Julian whimpered. 

Garak withdrew slightly and watched the younger man's eyes. They were darker than he had ever seen them before. His hair was disheveled and he was staring at Garak passionately.

"Yes?"

"I want you to… touch me. Please." Julian's voice caught in his throat, and he closed his eyes as his face filled with abandon. Garak's hand slid down between their bodies and started stroking Julian through his pants. Julian pressed against him eagerly, rocking his hips back and forth in an almost desperate motion. Garak swallowed hard as he realized that Julian was as aroused by him as he was by Julian. He scooped the young man up in his arms and carried him to his bed. 

"You know, Garak, if I wasn't so painfully hard, I would find this - embarrassing…" Julian admitted hoarsely. 

Garak only smiled. "I think this is the quickest way to get you into my bed, and quite frankly, my dear Julian, I feel like I am in a bit of a hurry."

He put Julian down on the bed and rid himself of his remaining clothes and then he leaned over the younger man to pull off his coverall. He pursed his lips appreciatively when Julian's smooth, golden skin was revealed to him. The slender body was wonderfully shaped - wiry, but muscular enough to be very pleasing to the eye.

"Julian," Garak whispered, suddenly self-conscious. "You are so beautiful."

"So are you, Garak," Julian responded, and Garak stared into those amazing hazel eyes quizzically. His gaze bore deep into Julian's, but however deep he looked he saw only honesty and admiration there. He relaxed and enjoyed it when Julian lifted his hands and let them travel across his body, but only for a brief moment. He could see the need and sense the desire that was burning inside Julian, so he reached out to satisfy both of their needs. Julian's need to be touched and his own need to explore that wonderful man lying so trustingly before him. 

He straddled Julian's legs and leaned forward, first kissing his lips, savoring the taste once more, then he let his mouth wander downward, slowly, teasingly. Julian writhed underneath him in youthful impatience.

"Garak, please…" he managed, and his hands shot up to dig themselves into Garak's hair, and Julian firmly pushed him downward. 

"If you insist," Garak chided. 

"I need this now, Garak… you can tease me later," Julian gasped.

Garak felt happiness at the words. It meant that Julian would not be satisfied with this one encounter. There would be more to come. Satisfied with this he obligingly moved downward and took Julian in his mouth. The young man let out a series of inarticulate moans and sounds in appreciation. 

"Oh, Garak… *gasp* …yes, just like that… *whimper* … ohh, feels so good…" 

Julian's sounds sent a wave of heat through him. He felt himself harden at the young man's obvious pleasure and at the taste of him. The scent that rose from Julian was exquisite and the feeling of the hardness inside his mouth was the most arousing thing he had felt in a long time. Eagerly, Garak mirrored the pleasure the younger man had given him only moments earlier. Soon Julian was writhing in ecstasy and moaning helplessly. 

"Garak, Oh - Elim, I…." 

Garak's mouth filled with the bittersweet taste of Julian's pleasure and he swallowed with satisfaction. As the younger man relaxed, Garak slid up to lie beside him. 

Julian simply turned toward him and pulled him close and Garak's heart tightened at the feelings he saw in the younger man's eyes. Warmth, tenderness - love? How long ago was it that someone had looked at him that way?

"Garak - Elim. Why did this take us so long to see? I've wanted you like this for so long…"

"Oh, I don't know Julian, but now that we have, let's enjoy it as much as we can."

Julian smiled. "That's a very good idea, my dear tailor. Let's enjoy it indeed."

Garak tightened his grip on Julian, and as they drifted to sleep, he realized that he wouldn't have to satisfy his needs in solitude for a long time to come and it made him feel warm inside... 

~ the end


End file.
